I’ve been battling with this seemingly harmless issue for a very long time and if I must say, I’m slowly overcoming.
Sense of shame is that feeling that creeps on you, debilitating you. It’s that feeling that makes you so self-conscious. I remember a time when I had to change school because my parents were going through hard times financially and so cannot cope with the school fees any longer. I literally threw tantrums even though I was about 14 years. I kicked against it, cried, wailed. You know why I did that? It was because the school I was asked to change to was a lower class one where I’ll have to trek to as opposed to the school bus I once boarded. I felt ashamed. I didn’t want to change because I felt people, most especially my friends, will look down on me. Pathetic, isn’t it? Well, I never changed. Not because I convinced my parents not to but because something happened that made me not to change.
That incident happened about four years ago. Whenever I remember it, I feel bad. The attitude I put on then was awful. I knew deep down in me that I can’t continue to be like that. I had to change. Why? Because the attitude is destructive. I’ll never reach any remarkable height nor attain anything worthwhile in life if I continue that way.
When you let sense of shame overpower you, you won’t be able to leave your comfort zone and do the things you need or want to do because you’ll feel people will look down on you if you do. Sometimes, we need to turn a deaf ear to what people will say or think. Sometimes, we need to stand up and do what we have to do, not caring or giving a damn about what somebody somewhere is saying about us.
If we listen to everybody, we’ll never achieve anything. There’s that vision you have in mind but if you choose to listen to people that will tell you it’s impossible to achieve your set vision, you’ll find it difficult to achieve it.
What am I driving at? Sense of shame is what we all face at one point in our lives. It’s left to us to decide whether we want to be consumed by shame or not. It’s left for us to choose whether we’ll allow what people think or feel about us to influence our actions and decisions. You know what? Most times, nobody is saying anything, nobody is thinking anything. It’s just in our head, more like a figment of imagination. So many grand feats might have been achieved, so many discoveries might have been made but too many people cared about what others thought about them. Too many people never made the first move because they feared failure and what others will think of them if they fail.
In conclusion, it’s high time we stepped out and do the things we’ve always wanted to do. It’s high time we stopped giving a damn about what people think. It’s high time we stopped feeling so consumed by shame and do what we need to do. It’s time!